Happy Sunday Book Friends,
I hope you're having a fantastic October. I wish you more joy and tranquility in the days left in this month and year.
Have you ever regretted not reading a book sooner in life?
The Jenta Reads Bookclub met yesterday to discuss the book "How to gain friends and influence people" at the Jenta Community library in the lovely city of Jos, Nigeria. This month, we chose this book as our nonfiction selection, and it was fascinating to hear the members of our bookclub discuss it. They provided excellent analyses and insights.
An Overview of the Book.
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie is the go-to classic book on human behavior and relationships. The book is a magic guide to help you understand people, make them like you, and win them to your way of thinking. Apply these rules at every opportunity, and it will increase your popularity and help you get along with people everyday.
Key Takeaways.
The book is divided into four parts. These parts are broken into principles.
Part One: Fundamental Techniques in Handling People.
Principle 1: Don't criticise, condemn or complain.
Principle 2: Give honest and sincere appreciation.
Principle 3: Arouse in the other person an eager want.
Part Two: Six ways to make people like you.
Principle 1: Become genuinely interested in other people.
Principle 2: Smile.
Principle 3: Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
Principle 4: Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
Principle 5: Talk in terms of the other person's interests.
Principle 6: Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely.
Part 3: How to win people to your way of thinking.
Principle 1: The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
Principle 2: Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say, 'You're wrong.'
Principle 3: If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
Principle 4: Begin in a friendly way.
Principle 5: Get the other person saying 'yes, yes' immediately.
Principle 6: Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
Principle 7: Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
Principle 8: Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
Principle 9: Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
Principle 10: Appeal to the nobler motives.
Principle 11: Dramatise your ideas.
Principle 12: Throw down a challenge.
Part Four: Be a leader: How to change people without giving offence or arousing resentment.
A leader's job often includes changing your people's attitudes and behavior. Some suggestions to accomplish this:
Principle 1: Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
Principle 2: Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
Principle 3: Talk about your own mistakes before criticising the other person.
Principle 4: Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
Principle 5: Let the other person save face.
Principle 6: Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be 'hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.'
Principle 7: Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
Principle 8: Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
Principle 9: Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.
Why do I love this Book?
This book is about life. Because it addresses significant concerns relating to human behaviour and relationships, it is about survival. We interact with people on a daily basis. People are emotional beings and we frequently display our illogical nature. We may base decisions on bias and stereotyping. However, this book offers us a manual for interacting with people.
Second, I view every principles presented in this book as universal since it is possible to apply it to every aspect of life, including business, politics, education, and daily living.
The book is captivating because of Carnegie's use of storytelling. It's a book I regret not reading sooner in life. I recommend everyone on the planet to read it. I believe that if we read and put these principles into practise, the world would be a better place.
I also like the quotes in the book and it's so difficult to pick a favourite one. But this one below stood out for me.
"In our interpersonal relations we should never forget that all our associates are human beings and hunger for appreciation. It is the legal tender that all souls enjoy."
AUTHOR:
Dale Carnegie ( November 24, 1888 – November 1, 1955) was an American writer and lecturer, and the developer of courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills. Born into poverty on a farm in Missouri, he was the author of How to Win Friends and Influence People (1936), a bestseller that remains popular today. He also wrote How to Stop Worrying and Start Living (1948), Lincoln the Unknown (1932), and several other books.